Aii! Everything bad bad! i chose it this way but it turn the other. aiiii all bad!

and joan would say " if i were a chinese mother bringing up her kids in america i would definately sound like this!"

and its probably true. judging on my circumstances and situation. everything i pined for. everything i hoped for. ALL THE OTHER WAY! but still came out this way. this very very bad way. that made our unhappy more unhappy.
although we have to minus the kids part.

well i once hoped for a bright bright shiny future. i was told my nose is not too big just the right size. doesnt make me cynical. but still i comprain. and with my comprains, my luck all flow out of me and into the air. and BAHBAHBAH! the north wind blew it south.
that is how i learn that with no luck you cannot do anything.
i wished for a normal life with normal happiness and some joy and some luck but no club. aiiii! see how it turned out! bad bad.. ALL bad! i wish to tell all this to my daughter but she will not listen. she has no ears because she is not even formed yet. ha! how very bad to joke about this. but true. its true. you cannot teach lucky. lucky comes with your fate. if your fate says NOOOO. no luck. means no luck! the end. thats it. NO MORE!. but if your fate says luck will blow your way. oh believe it will. not because you are naive. nor because your psykiatrics tell you to believe. its because your nose is not too big thats why.
my mother use to say something but i forgot. thats because i trust in my fate and cannot wait for her to finish her sentence to run away. so i never knew what she said. and now i fill myself with sorrow and regret. wishing i listened to my mother's chinese nonsense. aiiii how very bad. bad bad bad.

ok i'm done trying to speak like someone who just walked out of amy tan's book.

well this randomness is the effect of my fever. i've been so very ill these two days. and its not fair. i want to go to school and make merry with my friends. aiiiii so very bad!. how can queen mother of the northen skies make fun of me like that. aiii so bad. so very very bad!. ok anyway i'm so bored that even my .... my DOG is bored. well if that made any sense at all. I"M so bored that even joan is bored. oh come on already. get lost you lousy bug. get out of my body and look for someone else to torture!


i'd rather be a sparrow than a snail
yes i would
if i only could
i surely would

i rather be a hammer than a nail
yes i would
if i only could
i surely would

away, i rather sail away
like a swan, thats here and gone
a man gets tied up to the ground
he gives the world
the saddest sound
the saddest sound

i rather be a forest than a street
yes i would
if i only could
i surely would

i rather feel the earth beneath my feet
yes i would
if i only could
i surely would

away i rather sail away
like a swan thats here and gone
a man gets tied up to the ground
he gives the world
the saddest sound
the saddest sound

and joan would be giving the world the saddest sound. because the is the snail, the nail, the street, and the earth beneath everyone's feet.